The monsters inside my head are dead
We had a time together the afternoon of March 9, 2010
A premeditated poem might not be as good as the rest
But maybe that's the point of it all; to be not as good as the others
She's not avoiding me; no, she's just going to Egypt
Offering me some cigarettes, but we both think we're done
Gallavanting out west somewhere she'll be next week; I'm only heading a bit east
Relieved, we're back where we were to begin with and I'm heading home to Tennessee this summer
Yeah, I'll be there while she's overseas
I'm thinking currently of making connections before finally settling for a dream
California's where I belong, but I just might build a life where I'm going permanently
No... I'm not who I was or where I was in thought before anymore, so where I end up is yet to be seen...
Moving in that direction; yeah, that's where I was already going
Just the feeling that I haven't gotten there yet...
Distracted me from the reality that I would've been there
Looking, seeking for a sort of appproval to shine for you from another's eyes
Happiness isn't there, though; it comes in a deep, personal, intimate understanding of yourself
People give up, though, and it breaks my heart to know that
Fooling themselves; not finding out who they are only from themself
Underlying tensions lie disquised there, though; the tightening and lengthening brood
How very unfortunate, though; the ones intended to find it get carried away by other things while the ones who can't are left to transcend
Will I ever find or have I already found the one to commune with in the utmost way; do I want to now?
Or am I a freaK, does this game, feeling almost there, not being there at all, continue on into oblivion
Answer me this: Does this look like a face that cares? Me no thinks that means what you thinkst it means...
Not with the numbness, the truthful numbness now, instead of the fake one that was on display in the first place
We were happy in there talking, laughing, eating soup
Knocking down all the blockades to keep them out
`cause that's what this really is if you want to know the truth; going back to how things originally should've been
Bad feelings? Don't! I don't want you to; hell, I don't even want them reverberating `round here
When we were working together, when we had a job to do, that was great!
But can things be like that again? I'd like to think they might could be able to, but...
Trailing along down the path I've chosen, airing out all the closets, taking down all the pictures hanging on the walls
And all these ghosts I've had to deal with no longer dangle in front of my face...
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